Today I went on the treadmill for 15 minutes. It was all I could handle. Tomorrow I will shoot for 30 minutes. Seems like yesterday I could do 45 min on the EFX, 15 minutes on the treadmill or bike and another 15 minutes of weights. Guess I am officially de-conditioned. Ate ok--poached egg for breakfast and 4 sausage links. Lunch was a stuffed pepper. Then I had some roasted almonds and chocolate. So much for no carbs. I did eat less today than normal which is better than nothing. But I need to FOCUS FOCUS FOCUS on MEMEMEMEMEME!!! I want my life back! I want to go shopping for clothes and look good in them.
One of my earliest memories...I had to be 4 years old. My older sister who is only 1 year older than me was in kindergarten. I was in my crib. I was a real late bloomer. Had my bottle but when Mama filled my bottle with milk it was cold milk she gave me, not warm. She was on the phone and I had a hissy fit in my crib I remember screaming and crying about not having warm milk. Also around that time we were playing balloon in the basement. My mom, sister and I were all sitting on a blanket my mom had put on the cold concrete floor to keep our butts warm. We were tossing the balloon between us when I knocked over my glass bottle and broke it. It was the last bottle I had. Had to be 4 or 5--and I was really upset that I broke my bottle because I knew I would not be getting another one.
Do these experiences explain why I am addicted to food now in my mid 40's?
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